Coffee and Wasting Time in Des Moines
Des Moines is not hip. Obviously. One of my college adviser's once deemed it “The Gateway to Nebraska.” Despite it existing as the platonic ideal of northface-core congeniality, low costs of living, a relatively stable economy, and a ceaseless online media industry of listicles have reimagined Des Moines’s ethos. It has increasingly and surprisingly become more au contraire to declare it a generally conventional city. Many financier, insurance, and tech professionals have invested a lot into redefining the small metro as a nouveau riche Midwestern oasis for art, music, and youth culture. It will probably take another 500,000 people for the avant to truly manifest, but the burgeoning urban renewal (gentrification) stage of the Des Moines’s hipification has already commenced in the real estate market. For the sake of low income residents, I truly hope Des Moines never does become a cool place for the American petty bourgeois to live.
While Des Moines is peak normie, it isn’t a hinterland devoid of life. It may not be home to 7 universities, host harsh noise house shows, or have a cereal bar, but it does have a few very cozy coffee shops that I recommend to anyone I know from a megalopolis that is real and spirited according to the common knowledge of the national consciousness. Post-grad, I found myself needing to waste a lot of time applying for jobs and living the twentysome ennui. The following roasters are where I have spent many of my listless young hours.
Zanzibar’s Coffee Adventure (http://www.zanzibarscoffee.com/)
Yes, this is an article about my favorite coffee shops, but I should probably be forthright with the fact that I know absolutely nothing about coffee. I am not a java sommelier. I just know it tastes good, particularly with steamed milk. Apparently there’s something chemical/gastronomical about it that makes it good. I have not checked jstor.
Zanzibar’s coffee happens to taste the best in Des Moines. My mom and I have been going here since like 1999 and I can’t recall a time when I was disappointed. It’s really the distillation of what a coffee shop should be, right down to the lacking of wifi and brownish palette. It’s a solid place to read Badiou, or more likely in Des Moines, Gladwell.
Horizon Line Coffee (https://www.horizonlinecoffee.com/)
The first time I sauntered into Horizon Line in June of 2017, This Will Destroy You’s “The Puritan” was playing on some clean sounding speakers. It was a major vibe. I’m a simple man. It only takes spinning one of my favorite songs to hook me. The eyebrow-raising menu and clean aesthetic of the building was also a quite enticing.
If coffee making can be considered an artform, the baristas of Horizon Line are Des Moines’s resident impressionists. Their product is physically and mixologically elegant. I’m typically not the type of guy to get worked up over the stylism of a commodity I’m about to turn into pee, but Horizon Line’s craft cannot be denied. They put a lot of work into their drinks and it’s always a pleasure to hang out.
Scenic Route Bakery (http://scenicroutebakerydsm.com/)
Okay, so I have a skeptical relationship with Des Moines’ unfortunately named East Village. With its exorbitant living costs and steadily increasing whiteness, the district is basically ground zero for the city’s slow mutation into, I guess, a southern Minneapolis (https://tinyurl.com/y8gevx5t). That being said, it has a good bakery ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
Scenic Route puts out a fine croissant and they brew the robust Intellegentsia coffee brand which is both tasty and probably a bit too on the nose considering Des Moines’ local political intellegentsia most definitely devises their anti-worker policies there. Unfortunately, I adore the product more than I disdain the clientele. In life, you have to make choices, and damn do I love those cherry pinwheels.
La Barista (https://www.facebook.com/LaBaristaCoffee)
The only coffee shop out in the suburbs that I am fond of being inside. Past 42nd St, The Greater Des Moines Metro Area is mostly Starbucks. Don’t get me wrong, I’m down with a frappe, but sometimes you don’t want to listen Mike and Matt discuss their investment portfolios and experience Žižek’s philosophy on consumption come to life.
Thankfully, La Barista survived the soy mochaccino infestation of the early 2000’s, normie decor and all. There are so many endearingly dorky “coffeology” posters. It rules. It feels like you’re entering into September of 1998. Also, they are the only joint in Des Moines that plays jazz music (!?). Wonderful. I want so much more of that. When I worked at Holiday Aquatic Center during the summers of 2013 and 2014, I would quaff iced lattes there every morning before my shift and scribble horrendously bad poetry and feel effortlessly cool. I feel less cool now and all that whole milk has made it impossible for me to fit into my 17 year old skinny jeans, but I hold nothing against La Barista which remains excellent.
Java Joes (http://www.javajoescoffeehouse.com/)
Out of all the coffee shops I wasted my last months of 21 in this summer, Java Joes is by far the most classically urbane, or at least the closest you can get to being classically urbane in Des Moines, Iowa. Snug downtown on 4th St, Java Joes is a dim and a lil bit dusty outfit in proximity to the Court Ave liveliness. The wifi is often broken, but they sell this red velvet doughnut that is exquisite so I’m gonna give them a pass on that dysfunction.
Java Joes is a rad place to pass the time while you’re waiting for a show at the Vaudeville Mews. It’s got a lovably shambly atmosphere, a satisfying selection of brew, and a small center of youth culture in a city I’ve struggled to find any youth culture in. If you’re fond of wearing all black and drinking all black, Java Joes has got you covered.
